Dear mom and dad
It's not your fault
I'm sorry I'm not the kid you thought you'd get
But my story's not over yet so don't give up on me
It must be hard for you to see the bags under your little girl's eyes
And the bruises in beneath her feet from outrunning the night to get to morning beams
And only seeing her a few times a week

Dear mom and dad
I know it's not at all what you planned and I can't say sorry enough
But can you forgive me?
This life may not be for me but it's the greatest gift you've ever given me
And I'll never try to give it back again
I'll try

Dear mom and dad
I'm still that little girl that you read to at night
And whose feet I remember you holding so tight
Who'd sing in grocery stores and hug you after fights
You know I'd take it all back
The yelling and the throwing and the bags would be unpacked

Mom and dad
I never would've done those things if I'd known in the slightest what it meant to almost lose a kid
I'd never try to leave again, oh the things I'd give
All you've ever done
Was given the world to someone who spat it back for fun
Who only gave you one good day for a hundred bad ones
Because for me it was just a day not as bad as the other ones

Dear mom and dad
I understand now what it means to grow up
And I hate it but I love you so I'll give it all I've got
Because you gave it all to me and that means so much

Dear mom and dad
I'm sorry that I ever got sick
And I'm sorry over and over again for what it did
Believe me, I wish you could've gotten something better
Than the long nights, the long fights and the guilt trips spent together

Mom and dad
The promises I made didn't last but instead broke before our eyes like glass
The things I hid under my bed weren't love letters or toys
But punching bags and headphones used to drown out your voice
And I'm sorry I never loved myself half as much as you loved me

Mom and dad
I'm sorry this took so long to say
But believe me, I've had this stuff written down since the day
We had that fight where I threatened to leave
I walked out and I wrote it down
I said that one you'd be proud of me
One day I'd make this up to you
Because you got a rotten child for a price much higher than a decent one
The world played a sick joke on us and you were the punchline
And I'm sorry I did all the punching all the time

Mom you're not the only one who sees the good on this earth
But I'm too tired to bet on it
And Dad, I know the world weighs you down but you built this ground beneath my feet
And even though there's always rugs being pulled from under me

Thanks for catching me and picking me up off the floor
I'm sorry for that one time I almost broke my bedroom door
Because if one more word was said I would've exploded
The world's a lot
But you say 'sweet pea I love you' and I set that love of fire